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Summary of The School of Life 

Short summary

How would you like to learn a little more about yourself? We're all strangers to ourselves on various levels. But it's not our fault that we live in a society that thinks we need to know more about science and our environment than about our own selves. You're in luck today because you're about stepping into the school of life and given the education that your soul deserves. This summary would take you through the emotional education you probably never had. “We are all messed up, and we will never be as happy as we think we should be, but still there are lots of nice things to share and enjoy, and it is good to be nice to one another. . . . Each of these thoughts [is] a huge relief. I . . . found the book so convincing that I took its ideas into consideration while making some major decisions in my own life.” ~ The Cut

Key points


Emotional intelligence is the fulcrum upon which our lives gain balance

Humans are essentially emotional creatures, everything we do in life is driven by emotions. Many people don't realize this since it seems like logic takes the precedence in our daily decisions and actions, but the truth is, we're always more emotional than logical.

A few examples. Emotions dictate our buying decisions, not logic. We're committed to our intimate partners because of how they make us feel not necessarily what we think about them. The way we dress, the careers we pick, the cycle of friends we keep, etc, are all driven by emotions.

But it's sad that our emotions haven't been given the kind of consideration they deserve.

We've advanced so much in our understanding of science and technology. And we've come up with witty inventions that are making our lives easier. One can categorically say that we're a well advanced civilization. But when it comes to the emotional and psychological aspects of our lives, we don't seem to have made so much progress. It's true that we've grown in our understanding of the human mind and how emotions and habits work, but outside the academic communities specializing in these disciplines many people are still in the dark.
People run away from psychological and emotional topics because they seem mysterious.
We've been programmed to prioritize scientific information and the skills that would earn us money, above the understanding of who we are. The average parent is more concerned about their kids scoring high grades in school than they are about their emotional wellbeing. And the result of this negligence is a rich society that doesn't know anything about emotional intelligence. Topics along these lines aren't taught in school, unless you specifically enrolled for them. People don't know how to introspect and communicate, or how to read the moods of others, or even how to relate with patience, charity and imagination when people around them are suffering.

But you'll be different because the chapters that follow are going to teach you the basics of emotional intelligence and help you avoid unnecessary problems.

We are all products of our emotional inheritance

Most of what destroys our lives can be linked to emotions that we didn't consciously examine or interpret in time. When toxic emotions linger in our subconscious, they will grow to become even more toxic. For example, envy and rage from past relationships can grow if we let them linger for long. When they begin manifesting in our new relationship, the effect can be disastrous. And the tricky part is that we often can't tell the origins of our emotional outbursts, until we take the time to carefully examine our pasts.
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If you want to know how emotionally healthy you are, just observe your interpersonal relationships


Affairs begin long before the cheater finds a lover to cheat with


How to overcome the impostor syndrome: understand that no human is perfect


Sex is an integral part of human relationships



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