Many people see being single as a waiting period — just something you go through until the "real" part of life starts with a relationship. Social media, dating apps, and societal pressure can make it feel like that. But what if singlehood isn't something to fix? What if it's something to celebrate?
Being single can be one of your life's most transformative experiences. Think about it this way — you get to delve deeper or rediscover your passions and put your well-being first! It's exciting, isn't it?
And suppose you don't know where to start and wonder how to be happy while single. So did other humans, including great thinkers, psychologists, and even celebrities. If you want to deepen your understanding of self-love and personal growth, books like 'Single on Purpose' and 'The Untethered Soul' offer profound insights. Many find that revisiting these ideas regularly — through reading, journaling, or listening to summaries—helps reinforce the journey toward self-discovery.
Why being single is one of the greatest freedoms you'll ever experience
Childhood fairytales, Hollywood narratives, and social media often show us that happiness ties to being in a relationship. Friends and family ask, "Are you seeing anyone?" as if singlehood is just a phase to pass through. But true fulfillment isn't about meeting societal timelines, is it? It is more about creating a life that feels meaningful to you.
The truth? The pressure to couple up can lead people into relationships out of expectation rather than genuine desire. As John Kim points out in Single on Purpose, "Most people get into relationships without ever asking themselves, 'Do I actually want this, or do I just think I should?'"
If you've ever felt pressured to be in a relationship, take a moment to ask yourself:
Do I genuinely want a relationship, or do I feel like I need one?
What parts of my life already feel full and meaningful?
How can I create more joy without relying on a partner?
True freedom comes from releasing the belief that love is the only path to happiness. When you stop chasing relationships out of fear or social expectation, you gain something even more valuable — ownership of your life.
Become your own best partner: the art of radical self-love
If you're single, the most important relationship you can nurture is the one with yourself. We often focus on being good partners to others, but how often do we show ourselves that same care and commitment?
Self-love isn't just a feel-good concept — it's the practice of reconnecting with your body, emotions, and inner world. You create a sense of safety and belonging within yourself through breath, movement, and self-awareness. Following routines isn't for a one-time realization but an ongoing relationship worth cultivating every day:
Talk to yourself like a best friend. Replace self-criticism with kindness and encouragement.
Set boundaries. Your time and energy are valuable—protect them.
Celebrate your wins. Big or small, every step forward matters.
Take care of your body. Move, rest, and nourish yourself well.
Kamal Ravikant, in 'Love Yourself As Your Life Depends on It,' reminds us:
"If you don't love yourself, nothing else matters. You will try to fill the void with people, things, and success. But none of it will ever be enough."
The more you nurture this relationship with yourself, the less you'll look for external validation to feel whole. Building a life you love independent of a partner creates an unshakable foundation of happiness.
Healing while single: the gift of emotional freedom
For many people with a history of childhood trauma, being single can feel particularly challenging. Without the distraction of a partner or someone else to focus on, you're left to confront deeper aspects of yourself —sometimes ones you've been avoiding. That's why singlehood is often seen as an inward journey, offering a powerful opportunity for self-reflection and healing before stepping into a new relationship.
Clinical psychologists emphasize that understanding your attachment style can be a key step in breaking free from unhealthy relationship patterns and, for instance, fear of rejection or intimacy. Healing is a mind-body process. While emotional reflection helps us understand past wounds, our bodies also hold unprocessed emotions. Integrating practices like movement therapy, journaling, and shadow work into your process creates a bridge between inner awareness and embodied healing. The following methods help you regulate your nervous system and navigate this phase with greater ease and self-trust:
Movement therapy – yoga, dance, or mindful walks to release stress.
Shadow work – to acknowledge and integrate hidden emotions.
Journaling & expressive writing – to process emotions by getting them on paper.
In 'The Untethered Soul,' Michael Singer explains,
"The truth is, everything will be okay as soon as you are okay with everything. And that's the only time everything will be okay."
Letting go of past emotional pain is foundational to moving forward.
Science says single people might be happier than couples — here's why
There's a huge myth that single people are less happy than those in relationships. Research shows that single individuals often experience more personal growth and deeper social connections than married ones.
Dr. Bella DePaulo, a social scientist, found that single people:
Have more substantial social networks than married individuals.
Experience more personal growth and independence.
Feel a greater sense of life satisfaction when they prioritize their passions.
As Jennifer Lopez reflects in 'True Love,'
"Your soul knows when it's time to close a chapter, to let go of something that no longer serves you. Love yourself enough to honor that moment."
How to build meaningful social connections while single
One of the biggest fears of being single is loneliness, and it's valid. We're wired for connection, and being alone can sometimes trigger deeper wounds. The key is to differentiate between loneliness and solitude. Loneliness is the longing for connection, while solitude is the ability to be at peace in your own presence. Practicing self-compassion, engaging in meaningful social connections, and honoring your emotional needs can help transform loneliness into self-nourishing solitude.
Instead of waiting for romance, expand your social world:
Deepen friendships. Treat friendships like relationships. They're just as valuable.
Create a chosen family. Surround yourself with uplifting, supportive people.
Step outside your comfort zone. Join a club, attend events, or take a class.
Spending time with the right people transforms singlehood into a powerful experience. Love isn't missing just because romance is — friendship, community, and connection are all forms of it, just as real and as fulfilling!
Breaking free from the scarcity mindset
The idea that "time is running out" or that there aren't enough good people left is a false, fear-based belief. Love is not a limited resource. The truth is, there will always be opportunities for connection.
Remind yourself that life unfolds on its timeline.
Stop comparing your journey to others. Your path is uniquely yours.
Focus on abundance. There are millions of people worldwide and infinite ways to create meaningful relationships.
The best relationships aren't forced — they naturally happen when you live fully.
Designing your own life
Without societal pressure shaping your decisions, you can design your ideal future. What do you want your life to look like?
Vision boards – Map out your dreams and goals.
Personal milestones – Track progress in all areas of your life.
Journaling – Clarify your values, desires, and what truly makes you happy.
When you build a life based on passion and purpose, happiness becomes part of your everyday experience.
The power of mindfulness: being present in your single life
One of the biggest challenges of being single is the tendency to live in the future, waiting for the next relationship, milestone, or "chapter" to begin. But happiness isn't in the future. It's in the present.
Practicing mindfulness helps you fully embrace where you are right now — not just mentally but physically. A simple way to anchor yourself in the present is to notice how your body feels when you take a prolonged breath, feel the ground beneath you, or place a hand over your heart.
How to stay present and enjoy your single life
Savor the small moments. Be fully there, whether it's a morning coffee, a sunset, or a walk in the park.
Notice and appreciate your independence. You can make decisions freely — embrace that power.
Let go of "shoulds." Stop thinking I should be in a relationship by now. Instead, shift to the fact that I am exactly where I need to be.
Breathe through anxious thoughts. If loneliness or doubt creeps in, acknowledge it, then refocus on the present.
Tiny Buddha's perspective on happiness as a single person reminds us that singlehood is not an in-between stage; it's life happening right now. When you learn to be fully present, you realize how much joy is already available to you.
Embracing the joy of solitude without feeling lonely
Perhaps you've heard this before, but there is a big difference between being alone and being lonely. Some of the happiest people in the world have mastered the art of enjoying their own company. Here are a few ideas:
Create a self-care routine. Enjoy simple rituals like reading, journaling, or taking yourself out for coffee.
Try solo travel. Explore new places on your terms — it's empowering!
Engage in personal projects. Invest in something meaningful, whether writing, learning an instrument, or volunteering.
Practice gratitude. When you appreciate what you have, you stop focusing on what's "missing."
As Cleveland Clinic experts note, loneliness comes from a lack of meaningful engagement with yourself, not just from being single. So, in a way, it isn't just an emotion; it's a nervous system response. When you feel disconnected, your body shifts into a survival state, longing for safety and co-regulation. Engaging in grounding activities, movement, and self-soothing practices can help bring your system back into balance.
Singlehood as a path to growth and purpose
Many people use relationships as a distraction from personal growth. Still, singlehood is a rare opportunity to turn inward and define what fulfills you. Without external expectations shaping your choices, you can explore passions, set meaningful goals, and invest in the things that bring you joy.
This phase of life isn't just about self-improvement — it's about discovering what makes you feel truly alive. Whether deepening your creativity, advancing in your career, or giving back to your community, fulfillment comes from aligning with your passions, not waiting for love to complete you.
Questions to guide your journey:
What excites me? What hobbies or skills have I always wanted to try?
What areas of my life need attention? Is it time to focus on my health, finances, or personal growth?
Who do I want to become? What kind of person am I striving to be, with or without a relationship?
When you stop seeing singlehood as a waiting period and start using it as a time for deep self-exploration, you realize that happiness isn't found in a partner; it's something you build within yourself.
Final thoughts: living fully, single or not
Being single isn't a waiting period; it's a chapter of your life that deserves to be lived to the fullest.
Next time you find yourself obsessing with the idea of finding someone ASAP, ask yourself:
"How can I make this season of my life the most fulfilling one yet?"
You'll notice that when you start embracing your independence, investing in personal growth, and finding joy in the present, being single transforms from a "status" into an empowered way of living!
If these ideas resonate with you, exploring the wisdom of experts can offer even more insight. Books like 'Single on Purpose' by John Kim or 'The Untethered Soul'' by Michael Singer provide valuable perspectives on self-love, personal growth, and fulfillment. If you're short on time, summary platforms like Headway can help you get the key takeaways quickly.
