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Summary of Dude, You're Gonna Be a Dad! How to Get (Both of You) Through the Next 9 months 

Short summary

Here's a go-to guide for the anxious dad-to-be, who can't wait to roar off into fatherhood. Just before you start spouting dad jokes, there's a whole nine months of pregnancy to get through with your spouse. In those nine months, you can be a pillar of support for your spouse. Or a nuisance. The job at hand is for you to know what to do every time, so you can be that pillar of support your spouse can lean on, during those 9 months; and not look or act stupid. In “Dude, You're Gonna Be a Dad,” John Pfeiffer, who's been through it all, wrote this manual for soon-to-be dads. Leveraging on his experience with his 3 children, his advice is prescient, telling you when to be full of positivity as you run through the nine months and when to be assertive. “It is much easier to become a father than to be one.” ~ Kent Nerburn

Key points


The best way to ready yourself for fatherhood is to get as much information as you can about the next 9 months

The best preparation you can give yourself as you get ready for fatherhood is to get armed with as much information as you can.
Equipped with the right kind of information, everything becomes easy.
For instance, consider trying to get your spouse pregnant. It is an easy task to accomplish if you know such information as the details of her cycle. Your spouse's menstrual cycle is structured in such a way that the window of opportunity for conception is available only for a few days in the month. You need to know exactly when this window of opportunity opens to be able to make the best use of it.

Once conception has taken place, it is wise to hold back announcing it to family and friends because of the risk of a miscarriage. Both of you need to carefully plan towards a good date to jointly make the announcement. Usually, it's best to wait for three months to lapse after conception. Your spouse's scheduled visits to her gynecologist as well as her ultrasound appointments with her sonographer also present opportunities for both of you to bond. Granted that you will not be able to make it to every one of her appointments; do make it a point of duty to be at her first, third, and fourth appointments with her gynecologist. At these respective appointments; the pregnancy will be confirmed, you will hear the first heart beats of the child, and see an ultrasound picture of the child for the first time.

Your spouse will need your help, love, and support as she deals with the vagaries of carrying the child. It is your duty to learn how you can be of help to her. And that's what this summary will teach you. The pages that follow are filled with actionable tips and advice that will arm you to become the best partner your spouse could ever wish for.

The female body changes during pregnancy and childbirth

Understand that your spouse's body will go through a lot of physical changes during the pregnancy. These changes will be stressful and emotionally overwhelming for your spouse. Support her by loving her changing body. You do this through words of affirmation and actions that show you aren't irritated by the changes in her body. Some men make the mistake of complaining about their spouse's body during this critical time. Some even go as far as refusing to make love to their pregnant wives. It may seem like nothing to you, but these actions will hurt your spouse.
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The best time to prepare for the challenging stages ahead is during the second trimester


Understand the childbirth process as your spouse's due date approaches


In the final weeks leading to your spouse's due date, start baby watching and keep up the support level to your spouse


To succeed in your new roles as parents, keep communicating clearly, keep planning together and be supportive of each other



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