summary ofGirl, Stop ApologizingBook by Rachel Hollis

first KEY POINT

Strategies we choose as kids affect our present behavior

When we were newborns, our parents' world revolved around us. Gradually, the more things we learned to do by ourselves, the less attention we received. Therefore, we came up with other ways to get noticed. Some made their parents laugh, while others did good things to receive praise. Disobedience is also a way to get attention: for many, anger is a better option than ignoring. These tactics have transformed with time, continuing to shape our behavior. Look at the excitement we get from likes on social media. The principle is the same as in childhood — we consider attention as love.

Societal expectations added some corrections to our strategies. For instance, they taught many girls that helping others was better than focusing on their aspirations. The following analogy illustrates how women fulfill this mission by losing themselves or attaining their dreams.Imagine two glass vases that receive water from someone. They want to share it with all around them. One tips forward and backward to spill to others. Having little left, it must lean too much — and falls, breaking into pieces. Another one stands still to fill up. Then the water overflows, filling others nearby. Think about how much female potential remains untapped in the former case. Moreover, what if women put themselves first, choosing another strategy?

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