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What do you do when your confident little girl grows into a self-doubting teenager? Every parent faces this heartbreaking transformation as their daughters grow up in a world where social media constantly tells them they're not enough.
But here's the good news: you have all-powerful tools to help your child thrive, and they're sitting right on your bookshelves. Get inspired by the top 10 books for raising girls who like themselves. Whether you're parenting girls through the tricky tween years or helping teenage girls navigate high school drama, the right parenting books can be absolute game-changers.
From Lisa Damour's influential 'Untangled' to the research by Dr. Christopher Scanlon and Rosalind Wiseman, these book suggestions are all backed by authentic strategies that you can implement. Most are accessible in Headway's library of book summaries, so you can create your own reading list wherever you are.
Try Headway today to squeeze maximum learning into small pockets of time throughout your day!
Raise confident girls
Discover the best books to nurture self-love and confidence in your daughter.
Discover nowQuick summary: Top 5 must-reads at a glance
Before going deeper, here are the absolute essentials every parent needs:
'Untangled' by Lisa Damour — Your roadmap through the teenage years
'Queen Bees and Wannabes' by Rosalind Wiseman — Get to know girl world dynamics
'The Whole-Brain Child' by Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson — How to build emotional intelligence from the ground up
'Daring Greatly' by Brené Brown — A lesson in courage over perfection
'How Children Succeed' by Paul Tough — The science of raising resilient kids
Read on and get the full list of the best books for parents!
Top 10 book recommendations for raising confident girls
From cracking the code of tween drama to helping teenage girls survive social media battles, the following books will help your child build confidence and improve their self-image.
Building rock-solid self-esteem
1. 'Untangled' by Lisa Damour
This bestseller is like having a wise friend who's been through it all. Lisa Damour breaks down the seven transitions girls go through from tweens to young adults. What I love about this book is how it normalizes the chaos. That eye-rolling, door-slamming teenager? She's actually developing exactly as she should.
Age range: Parents of girls 11–18
Key takeaway: Your daughter's mood swings aren't personal — they're developmental.
2. 'Queen Bees and Wannabes' by Rosalind Wiseman
If you have ever been interested in the secret lives of cliques and girl drama journals, Rosalind Wiseman can walk you through those mechanisms. Although the book inspired the famous movie Mean Girls, it is more than just entertainment or fun; it's a survival guide for parents of daughters who need to understand the complicated social lives of girls.
Age range: Parents of girls 10–16
Key takeaway: Understanding "girl world" helps you support without overstepping.
3. 'It's Not About You' by Tom Rath
Sometimes the best thing we can do for our daughters is work on ourselves. This book helps parents understand how their own baggage affects their parenting. It's perfect for your next book club discussion!
Age range: All parenting stages
Key takeaway: Healing yourself helps heal your family.
Developing emotional intelligence
4. 'The Whole-Brain Child' by Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson
This non-fiction parenting book lays out the idea that simply learning about your child's developing brain will broaden the ways your parenting can improve.
Age range: Parents of children 2–18
Key takeaway: Connect with emotions first, then redirect behavior.
5. 'Raising Girls Who Like Themselves' by Kasey Edwards and Dr. Christopher Scanlon
Kasey Edwards teams up with psychologist Dr. Scanlon to create a practical guide that feels like chatting with your smartest parent friends. They tackle everything from body image to academic pressure with real-life examples that hit home.
Age range: Parents of girls 5–18
Key takeaway: Small daily actions build lasting confidence.
6. 'Daring Greatly' by Brené Brown
While not specifically about parenting girls, this book transforms how we model vulnerability and courage. Your daughter learns more from watching you than from any lecture about confidence.
Age range: Parents at any stage
Key takeaway: Vulnerability is strength, not weakness.
Building resilience and grit
7. 'Girl Dad' by Madeline Anderson
To all the girl dads who are a little confused right now — this one's for you. Anderson combines research with moving anecdotes from dads who have found the recipe for raising confident daughters.
Age range: Fathers of girls at any age
Key takeaway: Dads have unique superpowers in building daughters' confidence.
8. 'How Children Succeed' by Paul Tough
This book changes how you think about success. Spoiler alert: it's not about grades or test scores. Tough shows how character traits like grit and perseverance matter more than traditional metrics.
Age range: Parents of children 5–18
Key takeaway: Failure is a feature, not a bug, in raising successful kids.
9. 'How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk' by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish
Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish provide you with precise lines for difficult conversations. For example, if your daughter comes home upset because of drama with her friends, you will know exactly what to say.
Age range: Parents of children 2–18
Key takeaway: Acknowledge feelings before solving problems.
10. 'You Are a Badass' by Jen Sincero
Okay, this one's a bit different. While it's technically for grown-ups, reading it yourself models the self-love you want your daughter to develop. Plus, there's a teen version perfect for your older girls!
Age range: Parents and teens 14+
Key takeaway: You can't give what you don't have, so work on your own confidence too.
Interactive quiz: Are you building or breaking your daughter's self-esteem?
Take this eye-opening quiz to discover how your daily parenting choices impact your daughter's confidence. Answer honestly — no judgment here!
The big takeaway:
Building self-esteem is about helping your daughter handle imperfection. The most confident girls aren't the ones who never fail; they're the ones who know their parents will love them through the failure and help them grow from it.
Want to dig deeper? Share your score with other parents or your book club and discuss which questions surprised you most. Sometimes the best insights come from realizing why specific responses felt natural even when they weren't the "right" answer.
What every parent needs to know about girls' self-esteem
Remember when your biggest worry was whether your kids would make the soccer team? Now, young girls are comparing themselves to filtered images before they even hit middle school. Studies show that girls' confidence peaks at age 9, then declines during the pre-teen years.
Dr. Christopher Scanlon, co-author of 'Raising Girls Who Like Themselves,' puts it perfectly: "We want our daughters to be curious and independent and ambitious. We want them to make good choices, to have the resilience to bounce back from their 'it seemed like a good idea at the time' decisions, and to possess the strength to recover from plain bad luck."
What's here isn't just parenting advice; it's a revolution in how we think about raising strong, confident girls.
The New York Times recently reported that anxiety and depression rates among young adults have skyrocketed, with girls being hit particularly hard. But here's what gives hope: parents who actively work on building their daughters' self-esteem can completely change this trajectory.
Make your parenting wisdom work with Headway book summaries
Whether you're just starting this journey with a young girl or you're deep in the trenches with a teenager, remember this: every conversation, every book you read, every effort you make matters.
You're not just raising a girl; you're raising a confident woman who will change the world, and she'll do it best when she genuinely likes who she is. With the top 10 books for raising girls who like themselves, you get the language, tips, strategies, and confidence to guide your daughters through a complicated world.
Start with one book. Join that book club you've been thinking about. Download that first summary from the Headway app. You can get the key insights from these parenting books in just 15 minutes — perfect for your commute or that rare quiet moment with your morning coffee. Your daughter's future self will thank you for starting today!
Frequently asked questions to raise girls who like themselves
Which book should I read first if my daughter is being bullied?
Consider reading 'Queen Bees and Wannabes' by Rosalind Wiseman first, which covers the aspects of the girl world and the dynamics of cliques. Next, try 'Untangled' by Lisa Damour, which includes suggested strategies, depending on your daughter's age. These books provide solid parenting support.
Are there books specifically about social media and girls' self-image?
Yes! Nancy Jo Sales talks about social media and its impact on teenage girls in her book 'American Girls.' For older teens, consider 'Girls and Sex' by Peggy Orenstein, which discusses how Instagram and TikTok impact body image and self-worth. These books suggest practical strategies for dealing with the pressure of constant online comparison.
Can dads benefit from parenting books?
Definitely! There is a book called 'Girl Dad,' which focuses on the unique challenges of raising daughters. Many girl dads find 'Untangled' especially helpful for understanding their daughters' emotional development, while 'Daring Greatly' helps them model vulnerability and build stronger connections with their girls.
My daughter won't talk to me. Which book can help?
'How to Talk So Kids Will Listen' by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish is perfect for this challenge. It provides actual scripts and conversation starters for opening communication with tweens and teenage girls. The book teaches you to validate feelings before problem-solving, which is often the key to getting pre-teens to open up again.
Is it worth joining a parenting book club?
Yes! Discussing these parenting books with others multiplies the insights and helps you feel less alone in raising girls who like themselves. Book clubs offer different perspectives on the same challenges, accountability for reading the books, and real-life examples of how other parents apply the strategies with their own daughters.
What are the top positive parenting books?
The best books about positive parenting include the following: 'Untangled' by Lisa Damour, which helps understand teenage girls; 'How to Talk So Kids Will Listen,' by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish, which offers communication strategies; 'The Whole-Brain Child,' which describes child development. These parenting bestsellers prioritize connection and self-esteem rooted in empathy over control, which is the essence of positive parenting.
