Self-growth
Business & Career
Success
Communication
Healing
Relationships
Psychology
HappinessYou’ll learn
- How to use body language effectively
- What makes first impressions count
- Why small talk can lead to big results
- How to build rapport quickly
Table of contents
first KEY POINT
How to build a civilization
What do the Great Pyramid of Giza, the iPhone, and Dr. Pepper have in common? None of them could exist without one thing: people figuring out how to connect with each other. The pyramid required thousands of workers coordinating for decades. The iPhone needed engineers, designers, and suppliers across continents to collaborate. Even Dr. Pepper started with someone convincing someone else to try a weird new drink. Every achievement of civilization began the same way: our ancestors learned to communicate.The same skill that built pyramids is the one you use when you walk into a party and don't know anyone. The same ability that launches products is what you need when you're trying to impress in a job interview. Therefore, connection is both humanity's superpower and a trainable skill. And like any skill, it has specific techniques you can learn and practice. Maybe you've met someone who seemed impossible to reach, where every conversation felt like pushing against a closed door. Even across that gap, there's always a bridge you can build.
End conversations positively to leave a lasting good impression.
So, what are you about to learn? An excellent first impression, emotional connection, mirroring, and gesturing can help you win your partner's heart, impress your boss, or find new friends. These tools can help you land the job and walk into any room feeling like you belong there. And here's what nobody tells you: as your connection skills grow, so does your confidence. The two feed each other. Want to learn more and discover a few more secrets? Let's begin with the moment everything is decided — those crucial first seconds.
second KEY POINT
You can't make a first impression twice
Think of your favorite movie characters and how the producers introduced them. Most likely, they were powerful presentations you will remember for a long time. Iron Man, James Bond, and Daenerys Targaryen captured viewers' attention in their first episodes and held it for years. Now, real life may not come with dragons, explosions, or a dramatic soundtrack… but the truth is, you can create a first impression that's just as memorable. There is a whole strategy for it.The first three or four seconds of a new acquaintance are precious because, during them, the brain subconsciously decides whether you will feel safe and comfortable to be around. Use them to the fullest by applying the Open-Beam-Hi!-Lean scheme. Here's how it works:1. Open your heart and body. Crossed arms or legs make people think you are not ready to be honest or talk, which may be far from the truth. Before you approach anyone, do a quick body check: uncross your arms, relax your shoulders, and turn your torso toward the person. Think "open chest, open conversation."
2. Eye and Beam. Eye contact and a friendly smile can instantly win a person's sympathy, so don't be overly serious. The key is to smile before you speak — let your face arrive first. Make eye contact, hold it for a beat, then smile. That sequence signals warmth before you've said a single word.
3. Say: Hi! After the visual, it's time for the verbal. Repeat the other person's name and introduce yourself. This way, you will remember them better and show interest in them. "Nice to meet you, Michael. I'm Sarah," sounds better than just a name.
4. Lean. Want to show affection without words? Nod slightly or lean forward. Most people do this unconsciously when listening to something interesting, but you can use this tip purposefully. A subtle forward lean of just a few inches signals "I'm engaged." But keep it natural. You're leaning in, not lunging.These tricks make the conversation a solid foundation for a long-lasting relationship, so don't hesitate to try them. The more you practice, the more automatic it becomes.
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first KEY POINT
Negotiating the maze of emotions
second KEY POINT
Your gestures are your best allies
third KEY POINT
Connection through mirroring
fourth KEY POINT
Play the senses like a piano
fifth KEY POINT
Conclusion
Related summaries
Frequently asked questions
What is 'How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds' about?
'How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds' by Nicholas Boothman focuses on building rapport and improving interpersonal skills quickly. It offers practical techniques for making strong, positive first impressions and connecting with others through body language and effective communication.
What are the key takeaways from 'How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds'?
Key takeaways from the book include the importance of eye contact, smiling genuinely, and using open body language. Boothman emphasizes that these simple techniques can significantly increase your likability and improve social interactions.
Is 'How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds' worth reading?
Yes, 'How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds' is worth reading if you're looking to enhance your social skills and make connections quickly. The book provides actionable strategies that are easy to implement in everyday interactions.
How many pages is 'How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds' and when was it published?
The book 'How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds' is 240 pages long and was published in 2003. It's a concise read that delivers valuable insights into social dynamics.
What techniques does Nicholas Boothman recommend in his book?
Nicholas Boothman recommends techniques such as mirroring body language, being genuinely interested in others, and listening actively. These methods help create a comfortable atmosphere that encourages connection and likability.