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Summary of I Thought It Was Just Me 

4.7 . 6028 reviews

Short summary

If there’s one feeling humans mutually share, it is the feeling of shame. We try to avoid some topics because we feel uncomfortable with them, and try to tuck memories of embarrassing moments deep in our minds. This shows that we do not have a good understanding of shame and thus, do not know how to overcome it. Brené Brown is an educator, writer, and nationally renowned lecturer. She is also a member of the research faculty at the University of Houston Graduate School of Social Work, where she recently completed a six-year study of shame and its impact on women. Researcher and professor Brene Brown addresses the culture of shame in “I Thought it Was Just Me,” teaching women how to live a life of courage. “We cannot experience growth when we are in shame, and we can’t use shame to change ourselves or others.” ~ Brene Brown

Table of content

  • Summary of I Thought It Was Just Me
  • About the author
  • What is I Thought It Was Just Me about?
  • Who should read I Thought It Was Just Me
  • Topics in I Thought It Was Just Me
first key point

While we cannot overcome shame completely, we can form a resistance against it

Listen the first key point
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We’ve all done something embarrassing in the past. And when we’re asked about it, we shy away from talking about it because replaying the event, even in our minds, makes us wish the earth could open up and swallow us. This feeling of shame is experienced by every human.

Many times, people believe that shame is reserved for the unfortunate few who have survived terrible traumas, but this is not true. Shame is something everyone experiences; it is an absolutely universal emotion. And while it feels like shame hides in our darkest corners, it actually tends to lurk in familiar places, including appearance and body image, motherhood, family, parenting, work, addiction, mental and physical health, sex, aging, and religion.
Shame is so powerful that we can feel shame by just talking about shame.
The impact of shame on human lives cannot be overemphasized. The less we understand it and how it affects our feelings, thoughts, and behaviors, the more power it exerts over our lives. We can't become completely resistant to shame; however, we can develop the resilience we need to recognize it, move through it constructively and grow from our experiences. “I Thought It Was Just Me” offers information, insight, and specific strategies for understanding shame and building resilience against it. This read is one every woman should ingest, as its practicality is just the right pill to build courage.
If you can find the courage to talk about shame and the compassion to listen, you can change the way you live, love, parent, work and build relationships. ~ Brene Brown
second key point

The key to dealing with shame is defining and understanding it

Shame is an emotion we all have felt at some point in time, but when we try to describe it or make it accessible for other people to understand, we struggle to find the words. Even when we find the words, people rarely want to listen. Experiencing shame is painful. The key to dealing with shame is having a good understanding of what it is. The first step to understanding shame is developing a shared vocabulary to communicate our experiences.
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third key point

Shame mostly operates through feelings of fear, blame and disconnection

fourth key point

Empathy is the best way to help build resilience against shame

fifth key point

In a bid to build shame resilience, it is necessary to recognize shame and understand our triggers

sixth key point

Understanding the big picture goes a long way in defeating the feeling of shame

seventh key point

Shared empathy helps us build a stronger resilience to shame while helping others out of theirs

eighth key point

In the battle against the feeling of shame, speaking up is an important weapon

ninth key point

Conclusion

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What is I Thought It Was Just Me about?

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Do you find yourself staring at your computer for long minutes, unaware of time slipping by? Do you enter a room and suddenly cannot remember why you stepped in the first place? Is it a herculean task for you to sit through ten pages of a book without reaching for your phone? If yes, your focus needs some work and fast.

Actually, yours is not a unique situation. Many adults like you have issues concentrating on a given task. However, in this fast-paced world of ours, you can’t afford to be not focused at all times. Thankfully, this article comes to your rescue! With the tips and tricks from Hyperfocus by Chris Bailey, you will get in the top percent of folks who have mastered the art of concentration.